The Delta Snake Review: A Music And Arts Blog - Early February Issue

IN THIS ISSUE:

- THE BLUES, RAP, AND ChatGPT - PART ONE

- LIES, MORE LIES, AND MUSIC HISTORY…AND STREAMING

- INSTRUMENT REVIEW: DONNER DLH-003 16 STRING LYRE HARP

- A SURVEY OF BUDGET INSTRUMENTS FROM AROUND THE WORLD

- SPECIAL PREVIEW: EPISODE 2 OF “I, IVY” ON VELLA, TITLED “MY GAELIC GARDIAN,

  JEZEBEL”

- SHORT TAKES

All content unless noted otherwise by Al Handa (deltasnake@yahoo.com)

The Blues, Rap, And ChatGPT: Part One

I'm sure most of you have heard about the new ChatGPT and the various views, ranging from embarrassingly uncritical raves to it being a third column for the AI conquerors who'll destroy humankind. The truth is probably somewhere in the middle; there's no doubt it'll be misused, but from my initial exposure to it, it looks like the next wave in search engines. It also has the feel of a paradigm shift and could profoundly change the tech landscape.

I know it's new, but think it will be a great quick and dirty tool for research tasks. However, if you're aiming to write a definitive essay on a subject above the level of regular Internet web content, then using a standard search engine to follow up on every reference is still the best way. It's best to do that anyway to doublecheck the Chatbot's output as it does express opinions and interpretations and hedges a lot. It made some statements that aren't correct and gives kinda sorta maybe nice sounding non-answers for conclusions.

The fact that it occasionally gives out false information makes it Internet-ready, so I'm not sure what the fuss is about. It lies less than humans and doesn't project insufferable fake virtue. However, as the software improves, I imagine it'll soon create text that makes it indistinguishable from politicians and Hollywood  Publicity Departments. The wrong facts here and there are harmless in an early draft; a good writer should check sources anyway and is assumed to have a point of view, so the Chatbot doesn't need to provide one.

I've been working on a piece about the connection between blues, particularly from the 20s to early Rap, and decided to see what the Chatbot would say. 

I'm going to present the answers the Chatbot gave to my questions, and after each one, I'll comment on the provided info. One thing, unless you want bland High School report style writing, this Chatbot won't give you a piece that can be cut and pasted onto a pro-level web page. It'll give you a good rough draft and do some of the heavy lifting.

The idea of using pre-generated copy for news and features isn't new. Newspapers got most of their national and international content from UPI or AP stories which were rewritten or edited by a reporter if not run straight from the feed. Most news organizations who still employ human beings will, if not already, use AI to generate on-time copy and maybe change a few words to make it read better. Political bias can be easily programmed in, so the transition should be seamless.

My initial point and I stress that it's a specific observation, is that there are similarities between early blues from the 20s and 70s rap music that originated from the African American street scene and the Sugerhill Label. I'll give you the Chatbot answer in bold italic, followed by my observations, any corrections, and my own opinion. Interestingly, my Grammarly software asserted that the Chatbot's output had several errors (which I didn't correct).

Question: Tell me about the similarities between Rap music and Blues.

"Rap music and blues share several similarities in terms of their origins and themes. Both genres developed from African American communities, with blues emerging in the late 19th and early 20th centuries and rap emerging in the 1970s. Both genres often deal with themes of struggle, hardship, and the experiences of marginalized communities. Additionally, both rap and blues often rely heavily on the use of improvisation and storytelling in their lyrics. Some notable similarities include the use of call-and-response and the emphasis on the performer's personal experiences and emotions."

That's an excellent standard answer that fits the modern view of both genres. Still, as someone who's listened to Blues since my teen years, I would say that the first half of the answer reflects a bias that Blues is purely about struggle and oppression, which is a view that emerged in the 60s when the demographic of the performers and audience began to include whites. That's a nuanced observation, and I stress that my view is strictly my opinion. The main reason the definition changed is starting from the 60s, the audience demographic began to shift, and most of the studies and documentation about the Blues were written by white scholars, writers, and record collectors. 

Most of those attempts to create a historical record were balanced. In other words, while there is no doubt that African Americans are and were oppressed, that didn't result in one-dimensional art. The Blues was a music form encompassing the full spectrum of entertainment and social expression. The range is vast enough that any opinion about the music can be both right and wrong and subject to dispute or the need to add scope.

I remember writing an article for my Delta Snake Review in the 80s, which listed all the subjects covered by Blues songs in the 20s and 30s and found well over a hundred. The themes ranged from having a good time, lousy time, booze, drugs, historical events, animals, philosophy, politics, sociology, religion, and the full range of sexual preferences. More than a few of the female singers were bi or gay. Unfortunately, most of these themes were bowdlerized out of the canon in the mainstream 60s reissues of blues records (though not in the small label releases).

The 20-30s Blues was also about rebellion and often characterized as "Devil Music" by the mainstream church, and as said in a previous blog entry, that was a theme that came up in classic blues songs like Robert Johnson's Hellhound On My Trail.

A short overview of the Blues would be; that it was part of the more extensive African American Music and Entertainment culture, and the Blues artists were primarily from rural areas like the Mississippi Delta (though every region had a distinctive style). While these artists were performing and recording, there was also Jazz from Louis Armstrong (which continued with artists like Duke Ellington) and other artists. Back then, a "Blues" was a particular type of song or instrumental that used a specific scale. In technical terms, a standard eight-note scale with the third and seventh notes flatted to create a "minor" feel. It was a common number in Jazz and didn't sound very similar to Delta Blues slide or ragtime.

To understand what happened to Blues and how it led to rock and roll, one has to look at how African American popular music evolved, from Blues and Trad Jazz to BeBop, Big Band, to Soul and Rap. That's a general description and omits dozens of developments like Funk, Hendrix-influenced Black Rock and Funk, and of course, Blues which became racially diverse.

The link between early Blues and Rap was that both involved vocal improvisation over what Rap artists call a "beat." In the case of the Blues, that meant a "vamp" or rhythmic music on a guitar that the singer sang over. It was a popular form in impromptu concerts in Jook Joints and clubs and a form of dance music. African Americans, like everybody else, enjoyed entertainment. The blues were also supposed to make you feel good too.

The sixties were a vital era for Blues. Here's was Chatbot said,

Question: How did the blues change in the 60s with white artists and audiences coming in

"In the 60s, the blues underwent significant changes as white artists and audiences became more involved in the genre. This led to a broader interpretation and commercialization of the blues, resulting in a fusion of blues with other genres such as rock and roll. The blues became more electrified and the use of amplified instruments became more prevalent. Additionally, the blues began to be performed for larger and more diverse audiences, which influenced the way the music was performed and the lyrics that were written. This period marked the beginning of blues-rock and marked a departure from traditional rural blues styles."

That's a good answer and perfect for a piece with space or word restrictions. The answer is more complex than that, of course. I would add:

The 60s was a significant era for Blues. So much of the urban Black audience had moved on to R&B and Soul (and Jazz, etc.), which was as natural an evolution as whites moving on from Folk and Big Band, and it became mainly a club-level scene that was still full of vigor and innovative artists. That split the Blues into two main camps; from the hard-edged electric music flourishing in places like Chicago to the older artists from the 20s-30s who were beginning to be "rediscovered" in Folk Festivals and small label recordings. That "rediscovery" label must have annoyed more than a few African Americans, I would think, as the more correct term would be an introduction to a new generation or revival. We'll get more into that in Part 2.

The usual historical line is that the English discovered the Blues and created their own brand that reintroduced the music to America. That's true, but it's more complicated than that. Among the earliest blues that made it to England via old records was 20s jug band music by artists like Gus Cannon, which helped start the skiffle craze, where young men who later formed groups like the Beatles, and got early exposure to music and performing. After that came the stream of other blues and jazz records, and artists like Muddy Waters found an enthusiastic audience for their music.

That, plus the emergence of Elvis in the 50s, changed the course of blues and R&B in America, and that history is out of the scope of my article.

Obviously, I didn't ask the Bot to write an entire article. That's my job as a writer, but exploring how this new tool can assist has been interesting. It could be useful to publications that want to generate a lot of content without dealing with writers or deadlines and want to crank out copy on trending subjects. It also looks suitable for creating bio and introductory sections for the beginning and end of articles and interviews (if the subject doesn't provide one), and straight news items.

So, Chatbot agrees there's a connection, and in Part 2, we'll see what it says about early Rap.

Lies, More Lies, and Music History…And Streaming

History is about what happened,  Science is about what is, Spirituality is about what should be, and the music industry is about selling product.

Historians generally take about a hundred years to sort out the data to develop a balanced view. It's a democratic process where a particular idea can become fact if the preponderance of the evidence is that a majority of opinion says it's so. The process is even more flawed because most people only know what they've read or heard.

Needless to say, in any Democracy, what the truth is will always be in dispute, and fortunately, like in the case of professional sports or rock music, the multitude of conflicting, insightful, or immature opinions rarely cause any real harm to society and the impassioned debates are a good way to blow off steam or give insecure egos a much-needed boost.

A good example is the American Civil War, a subject still causing heated debates of varying accuracy between people who earned the full range of A to F grades on the subject in school. Of course, we could also include the suspect level of scholarship by those who cheat in exams and utilize A.I. Bots to write term papers, but this essay isn't an attack on the American Way.

Back to the example...The Civil War was initially viewed as a crusade to end slavery by one side and a defense of slavery and states rights by the other. There was no Internet, so the thousands of supporting or dissenting opinions were known only to Historians with access to the source documents.

Thanks to the Internet, we now know that most agree it was a Civil War between the North and South, but also that the latter region had its own brand of rock and roll, complete with fans who desecrate their flag by using it as sweatbands, patches to cover holes in pants, and beach towels to sit on just like Northerners do with Old Glory. 

Note: I just gave a single example to represent universal truth.

In other words, history hasn't changed much. It's just that all of the true, weird, suspect, and silly stuff is accessible to all, and that's the way it should be.

Disclaimer: The above example is an oversimplification due to the constraints of creating content without the use of A.I., and the mission of The Delta Snake Review is to entertain modern attention spans with only the pertinent facts before the writer himself loses interest.

Music history is the same intricate web of truth, mythology, trivia, and B.S.; a good example is the rise and fall of 60s rock. 

As said in previous blogs, the single was the favored vehicle for popular commercial Music. The problem was that the emphasis on songs left too much money in the consumer's pockets, which filled American Capitalists with longing and concern for the detrimental effect unspent cash has on yacht makers and the caviar industry.

The obvious solution, the sale of long-playing records, was a hard sell because it forced the consumer to buy a set of songs to get the one they wanted. That was money better spent on station wagons, color T.V.s, and trips to amusement parks.

The 60s saw the rise of the longer format, which continued through the CD era until the advent of digital streaming.

In the decades since that turbulent and profitable time, the body of data has grown bigger than a hippo's butt in an economy-class seat, and it would take an expert to sift through the murky river of facts. 

That's a thankless task that the Delta Snake Review can handle by assigning its expert who has easily met the Internet requirement of having a free email address to qualify as a Historian.

The reason that the Music Industry was able to make L.P.s the main product was simple; they got consumers to regard those as the new single, much as age 60 is the new 40, or avocado toast is the new hot dog. 

Rock artists quickly came on board once they realized that the change would make them rich and express themselves without the fascist restrictions of Top 40 singles. The idea of passive income without having to tour was as compelling as poop to hungry flies.

The L.P.s were marketed as "Concept Albums," "Personal Statements," "Monumental Works," "Song Cycles," "Heavy Trip, Man," and other means of simplifying the melancholy drudgery of choice.

To be fair, these milestones of commercial success were created by artists with a variety of motives that ranged from integrity, artistic vision, personal conviction, passion, educating the public, ending the war, getting B.J.s from young women, free coke, insulation from criminal charges, sweating a lot, wearing makeup, being cool, and so on.

In other words, people were persuaded to buy the more expensive product without complaint, and no rock star would kick a wad of C Notes out of his bed, man.

That Golden Age ended with streaming, giving consumers the power to pick and choose individual songs again and create playlists that aren't influenced by business considerations.

The Vinyl Revival has helped carry on the old-school aesthetic of buying in bulk at premium prices, and that's good also. Anything that adds to choice is good, even if Record Execs and some Artists might resent having to buy their drugs and drive themselves. 

However, while acknowledging the process is brutal to artists who put their hearts and soul into it, it's not anymore so than competition within the industry.

The critical thing to remember is that Music was there before the industry and will be there after. It's said in sports that no one is bigger than the game, and it's valid for Music. If there were no recordings, people would still create it. After streaming, Music will still be there.

The artists and industry Execs who don't like what streaming is doing to their livelihood brought it on themselves by ignoring the complaints of consumers. When listeners got a chance to take Music back, they did. They're not just thieves or people who don't care about artists. It's the industry's job to make customers want and respect the product.

Music is itself. It's not just a product to buy or sell.

If the Beatles catalog disappeared, it would be a loss, but people would just make more Music. As far as quality, tell parents watching their child playing at a recital that its inferior entertainment. They're watching Music being made, and that's always the real joy.

Whether such music is good or bad is a different subject and is only relevant if money is involved.

INSTRUMENT REVIEW: DONNER DLH-003 16 STRING LYRE HARP

The Lyre Harp is one of the oldest instruments and is still used to play "parlor" or front room-type music. The reason is that it's an easy instrument to play (once you get the hang of tuning it) and, like similar instruments like the zither, is ideal for accompanying vocals.

Also, and this is a technical observation that will make sense after playing a lyre harp, the two-octave range (16 notes) gives the player a wide range of sound as the music played can be based on modal or note structures instead of chords. 

The Legendary Miles Davis changed the direction of jazz in the late 60s by exploring modal concepts, which significantly influenced 60s free-form rock.

However, even a 16-string lyre can produce plenty of chords once the player is familiar with it.

Most of that background info isn't necessary except to assure the potential buyer that a lyre harp is an actual instrument in areas where people think serious instruments like guitars have to cost over a thousand dollars. Most people in other parts of the world consider a hundred-dollar harp a bit pricey.

The primary purpose of this type of Lyre is to make music. It provides joy and satisfaction that even the finest records can't match (it's a case of apples and oranges). It also connects the player to centuries of tradition from when audiences in villages listened to primitive harps up through the Celtic Age. Of course, that's a simplification but true.

Although it's played differently, the Lyre is similar to the harmonica, another inexpensive music maker that found popularity in Folk and Country and is a primary soloing instrument in the Blues.

Both have in common that the primary type is tuned to whole notes, which in simple terms, means that it's impossible to play a wrong note. It's similar to playing only the white keys on a piano or tuning a guitar to a chord. 

That's an excellent quality in a beginner instrument. My first instrument as a child was the violin, which I played for about six years. It was tough to play even whole notes correctly, and I saw more than one kid quit playing one because of the difficulty in learning to play even simple melodies. 

I mention the violin because it, along with wood peg banjos, gave me experience in tuning string instruments with a 1:1 tuning ratio. That is to say, there are no gears to make a turn of the tuning peg and not break the string if it's cranked over even a single rotation.

That's one aspect a prospective player should be aware of before tuning a lyre for the first time. Suppose one watches YouTube videos about this instrument. In that case, it's obvious, and the very slight turns are arguably beginner friendly because the notes move up and down in direct relation to the turn of the peg. 

However, having to crank it over a few times to get up to tune isn't necessarily easier. Beginning guitarists always break strings with geared pegs, and hundreds of years later, no one has seriously tried to make violins with geared pegs (though not necessarily a bad idea. Sitars with such pegs are available).

That said, this Donner Lyre does provide extra strings in case a beginner treats it like an Apple Computer and starts just cranking away without learning it first. After the first broken string, the tendency to over-tune generally stops. I've played string instruments all my life and still break a string now and then though I'm now experienced enough to blame it on a defect in manufacturing.

I should note that this review presents information in a different order than usual. It's written as a beginner might see it as opposed to a sales pitch. It's an instrument that will enable you to play tuneful music right from the start, as long as proper attention is paid to setup and tuning. 

The most immediate application will be Celtic Harp Music. The Lyre may not have the same range or richness in tone, but one could say those are considerations that are more relevant to serious players who intend to play advanced pieces or live. Only a harmonica is easier for something that can be left around to be picked up and played for fun.

All beginners will start with a standard whole note scale, and when plucked at random (or seen on YouTube), my point that there'll be no wrong notes will be more obvious.

As far as a point for the future, it is a tuned instrument. Just change the tuning if you want to explore scales with "flatted" or "sharp" notes.

The tuning videos on YouTube are good, but I'd recommend using a decent electronic tuner to make fine adjustments. A beginner's ear won't detect if a note is a bit sharp or flat so it won't be a problem at first, but as the skill level increases, it can make you think you're playing out of tune. If that happens, congratulate yourself; your skill level is improving. 

You can use a clip-on type on the bridge, but my workhorse has always been an ancient Korg CA-30 Chromatic Tuner, which can also tune by sound. It's over 20 years old, hasn't needed a battery change, and the casing doesn't turn to a white sticky paste like cheap modern clip-on seems to do. It can even make tuning sounds, but I never use that.

So, time for unboxing. In the case of the Donner, you get a good enough gig bag, extra steel strings, a tuning wrench (try not to lose it, it's convenient), and light gauge picks.

There are differences between a Celtic-style harp with steel or nylon strings. That's a tonal difference. One should watch videos and listen to both types of Celtic harp music. It's a good idea to do that because one might not produce the sound in your head (believe me, it's there, it's why everyone buys an instrument).

Though a steel string has more highs, how to produce a clear tone is different than nylon. A beginner tends to pluck too hard, creating a scratchy or pinging tone. Instead, start off softly, and let your fingernails slide smoothly over the string, which in the higher notes are very tight and don't need much pressure to produce good time.

This type of harp is quieter, so plucking to try and fill a room with sound won't work at first. But, as you improve and your finger works more surely, the volume will increase. Again, check out the videos to see if getting one with an onboard amplifier is a preferred option.

Note: I refer to videos a lot because music is best taught by listening.

The Donner is a decently priced lyre harp, and the 16 strings have a nice range. More than adequate for a beginner or someone like me who likes adding different low-cost sounds to my instrument collection and enjoys Celtic Music.

The tone is very good if played correctly. It's good enough to record with if you are familiar with mastering software like the free Audify program that can add reverb and other effects. Not every advanced player with a full-sized Celtic Harp may agree, but you can't worry about stuff like that as a novice.

The Donner is a good option if you want to make music at an affordable price. As a matter of disclosure, I got mine as a gift after casually mentioning my intent to get one, but after playing it, I can see that it'd have been a good buy, that is to say, an instrument I'd actually use.

Regarding good beginner instruments considered "serious" around the world, check out the following article, which gives a brief survey of what's out there.

A SURVEY OF BUDGET INSTRUMENTS FROM AROUND THE WORLD

Note: Unless noted otherwise, all of the instruments shown were pulled off the Amazon site and easily available. There aren’t any obscure items in this survey.

It's not a criticism to say that Americans think that instruments have to be expensive; it's just one of our quirks. But if the country couldn't afford multi-million dollar fighter jets, it would quickly find a low-cost version to do the same job.

Many in the world music community still play what Americans consider folk instruments. While many stars don't play concerts on the scale of a Taylor Swift or Rolling Stones, artists like Zamfir developed a considerable audience playing the Pan-Flute, which is easy to make and play music people still enjoy listening to.

In other words, talent will always count more than hardware.

Tell a Hispanic that bongos are a cheap toy, and he'll treat those as fightin' words, and a large part of Islamic music is vocals accompanied by percussion. Native American Folk uses percussion and flutes, and a significant form of traditional Japanese music is the solo flute (which includes Shakuhachi).

I remember watching a legendary Jazz Drummer from Brazil named Aierto who demonstrated various percussion instruments like rattles, etc., which struck the audience as an assortment of party noise makers. His wife, the great Flora Purim, then began to sing a slow Brazilian song in almost total darkness, and as the song progressed, each of the percussion instruments came into play and sounded musical.

For the Americans in the audience, it was a revelation, and it drew a standing ovation, but I'm sure for someone from South America, it was just music as usual.

Some of the most esteemed African Folk were made with cheap guitars and percussion sounds by someone tapping a soda pop bottle with a spoon (also used in some old 20s Blues numbers). In old-school Cajun and Zydeco, the percussion is a triangle, which sounds so perfect that it's hard to imagine any other instrument being used to keep the beat. 

I once watched a YouTube video by Daniela Mercury, a star in world music, and her band included percussion players who just used shakers or rattles. A rock band might have the lead singer do that now and then, but in South America, it is part of the group's sound.

The usual advice Americans get is to pick up a cheap guitar or recorder (which can be a serious Medieval, classical instrument) and learn simple chords and melodies. Still, suppose your aim is simply personal pleasure. In that case, the world offers economical alternatives that produce fun music and maybe even connect you to a culture that's in your background or one you admire. Not everyone needs to play rock and roll, which is just a concept and is played in various forms worldwide.

So, with a bit of comment for each one, here's a small list of world instruments that might fit the bill.

Percussion

It's the oldest form of music and is still played worldwide. In America, people still do it in drum circles and for spiritual growth (and the fun of whacking out a beat). In addition, more than a few rock drummers are familiar with percussion and play these as a second instrument.

The one drawback for Americans is the lack of melody (though a good conga player would disagree) and the fact that rhythm section players often don't get the same respect as guitarists or singers. Just play along with records; it'll sound like you're in the band.

The most common percussion instrument in the U.S. is probably the Conga, as even rock bands have used those. Unfortunately, the American talent for making things expensive has made even economy models rather pricey. However, if you're ever in a Latin American country, these can be bought at a lower price.

The ones worth looking at are bongos. There's the image of a drunk surfer or beatnik banging away at one, but if you check out Latin American music videos, it's clear that most good bands have a top-notch bongo man, and for a good reason; along with timbales, it adds a lot of sharp top end and drive to the rhythm section.

When you watch Latin or Caribbean music on video, you'll see the bongo player is having a great time. That's fun you can have, too, even if it's just playing along with a record.

Verdict: Bongo Man or Woman is a cool nickname.

Another drum on the other side of the spectrum is the Irish Bodhran, similar to other "frame' style drums like Native American or Middle Eastern types. It has struts in the back, which you use to hold it, and press a finger or two against the back of the skin to control the tone. The one catch is that the stick, or “beater” is held like a pencil and strikes the head in a sweeping motion that takes practice to master. However, I leaned it just watching a video so that means anyone can. It can be played with the hand also.

Experts recommend tunable types, but those are expensive, and tuning a drum head is more of a professional application. For fun, just press the head with a finger and adjust the tone that way. The best way to deal with someone spoiling your fun by pointing out more expensive is to tune them out (I'm talking to you, America).

Note: Djimbes here sold by African Imports.

African Djembes and "talking drums" are worth looking into. Talking drums can be more expensive as those are rarer, but again, check those out on YouTube and see what you think. The Djimbe does have a hand technique but it’s easy to learn. The talking drum is multi-voices, as the ropes are squeezed to tighten the head to produce different tones.

BjizzleArtsnCrafts

All of the above suggestions are welcome at drum circles, too, so group fun is also an option. Drum music has never disappeared because it has spiritual benefits, and rhythm is always good for the soul.

Verdict: Imagine the drum head is the face of someone you hate, and the smile people see will be attributed to the spiritual effects of the ancient spirits called forth by the healing of rhythm.

Heading over to the other side of the world, for less than a hundred, one can get a small two-stringed Chinese bowed instrument commonly used in their folk music. Of course, it might appeal more to Asians, as the scale system is different, but it's a nice start.

Verdict: No one will know you're playing out of tune, possibly even you. That makes it an ideal beginner instrument.

There is the small-necked Saz from Turkey. For a little over a hundred, with more advanced ones staring at two hundred. That's an excellent scale-up versus the usual advice to buy a thousand-dollar guitar. I've owned one, and it's easy to play and can be used the same way a dulcimer is used in Western-style Folk. 

I remember when it was sold. A young teenage woman came with her boyfriend and said she was interested because it seemed like a fun, easy instrument. The guy seemed a little bemused until she tried it out and, within minutes, started picking out notes. His expression changed to surprise, then a big smile as a simple but nice melody came out of the Saz. She was, of course, ecstatic, and rightly so. She was right; it was a fun and easy instrument to play. 

I used the proceeds to buy a used Les Paul, and frankly, I think she got the better end of the deal.

Verdict: Play a Saz and be the only one on your block (or city) to own one.

The most famous Folk instrument that most Americans haven't heard of is the dulcimer, shown in the picture being played by Jean Richie, one of the legendary Appalachian musicians. Most folk artists know about this one. Other famous artists who’ve played one include Joni Mitchell. The appeal is that it's stayed mostly true to its roots as an affordable pro-level instrument often hand-made by the player.

It's a "drone" type instrument, and it's tuned so that there are no wrong notes. So anything you play will be in tune. It's primarily used to accompany vocals, but Jean Ritchie showed that it could be a solo instrument. 

Verdict: Play the dulcimer, and no man can call you a coward.

The most glamorous cheapie in the U.S. is probably the harmonica, which in the Blues is referred to as a "harp." The standard in-mouth harp is Hohner, but those have gotten pricey, so I've pictured a cheap Fender brand that's just a little over ten dollars. Good old Fender.

Besides the American way of doing things, the top end has gotten expensive because in professional use, the reeds inside wear out or break, and not all are designed to let the player take it apart and replace the reeds. For the casual player, a ten-dollar cheapie will last for years (if taken care of). The appeal for the novice is like most others, it's an instrument one can play immediately, and every note will be correct. It can be used for all kinds of music, and in the blues, a good harp player gets the same respect as a guitar player. Legends like Little Walter and Charlie Musselwhite all led bands. 

Verdict: Play the harp, and you're joining a tradition. After that, it costs a lot more.

Another ancient instrument is the flute, and while the best-made are costly, playable ones can be had for less than fifteen dollars. As wind instruments, there are three types; the vertical Shakuhachi, the regular classical flute, and the whistle type like the Irish or ocarinas.

The ocarina has been played on two rock hits; the Troggs "Wild Thing" and Mellencamp's "R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A." The Peruvian versions here are among the cheapest and coolest looking. The bottom has two holes that are covered by the thumbs. That's a big deal, as that makes key changes possible and dozens of note combinations. It looks like a toy but has a bigger range than a standard harmonica.

Verdict: Very cute decorative pieces if your drive doesn't match your desire.

The Shakuhachi is a vertical flute, which means you blow into it like a soda bottle at a party, except the music doesn't sound like a fart, and by varying the wind pressure, different tones, and moods can be achieved. 

Verdict: Very popular with New Age music fans, and unlike many other instruments, the fewer notes, the better. The Clint Eastwood of instruments.

The Irish tin whistle has always been inexpensive but challenging to play correctly. If played wrong, that clear tone heard on Celtic records sounds more like a shriek. However, practice can solve that problem.

Verdict: If you lose interest in these flutes, you're only out the price of a pizza, but if that bothers you, perhaps the vision to play the music of the Ancient Clan Tribes was never there.

The last is the Pan Flute, which is a bunch of different-length tubes you blow into vertically, like the Shakuhachi. As said earlier, Zamfir became a huge star playing one, and it's still a popular instrument in countries like Peru. The most famous U.S. example is Simon And Garfunkel's "El Condor Pass," a hit off the "Bridge Over Troubled Waters Album."

Verdict: Play a Pan Flute, and you'll get all the chicks. Tell them you know Zamfir.

There's a lot more, but the intent was to give you a little survey of what's out there. Of course, the big guitar companies, with the laudable exception of Fender with their cheap harp, want to sell you a vision of music on premium-priced instruments, but a lot of people in the world like to make music at low cost, and there's always a place for that.

I didn't mention ukuleles because those are well-known. That instrument probably saved a lot of guitar stores during the craze because it brought in many new customers. A lot. Every store I went to quickly stocked up on ukuleles and didn't regret it. The new customers kept coming back, and some moved up to guitars. 

It's a fine instrument, and one of my most treasured possessions is a charango, a Peruvian/Bolivian instrument that's similar (but is more complex to tune). You can hear my charango piece on YouTube, Spotify, Amazon, Apple, and other services. It's called "A Charango Is Born In The Andes." The title is significant, but I'll explain the meaning in a future article on the charango, which has a fascinating and revolutionary history.

 SPECIAL PREVIEW: REPRINT OF EPISODE TWO OF “I, IVY”

TITLE: MY GAELIC GUARDIAN, JEZEBEL

Link to free episodes:  https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0B3RCBT4D

My education at Shitzu University began when my rescuer, a tiny Irish fireball with lots of freckles and bright red hair that smelled like wet dog fur, mentored me in the ways of the world to prepare me for adoption.

My savior went by the name of Jezebel "because any woman remembered by name in the history books must have been a righteous butt-kicker who didn't take any crap from men and a gentle person who liked animals."

Jezebel, or as she was called by the Vet, "Alright, you don't have to shout," made sure that all of us Shih Tzus got first-class treatment, although the good doctor who called himself "I'd have done it anyway without your nagging" always seemed to look relieved when she left.

I'll give him credit; he seemed to really want to bite her leg but managed to restrain that impulse. That would be an admirable quality in a dog.

Jezebel addresses the Vet by many names, but the most common was "Stan." He was an older man, still very skinny, which would make him around twelve years old. Jezzy said his body defies gravity as the beer belly goes up into the brain instead of the stomach, whatever that means, though I think it means that his hair is long like a woman.

Jezebel would come by every day with tasty treats and talk to us. She said lots of people wanted to adopt us and vowed that we would all go to perfect homes. Any owner not meeting the standard would get "a taste of the whip." I'm not sure what that means, but it must be like putting them on a leash.

She was present at the interview with Al, who got the first chance to adopt because he was willing to come in the afternoon. The Vet said before being scolded, "We have a dozen other dogs besides these Shih Tzus; it's first come, first served."

Jezzy silenced him with an ancient Gaelic war cry, then whispered to me, "He's sort of right, but I'll stay with you and make sure this Al is worthy." The Vet, who now calls himself "Fine, but I make the final decision," didn't seem happy about her joining the interview, but since he couldn't bark louder, he had no choice.

As Al walked into the lobby, Jezebel hissed, "The guy wears sandals like some hippy; if I can smell nasty feet, this interview is over."

The Vet sniffed, "I was a hippie in the 60s," and the Irish Maid retorted, "I rest my case." They then flashed the biggest smiles ever seen from two people who wanted to claw each other to death and greeted Al.

I heard them because Shih Tzu bodies are 30% ears with a range of around ten miles.

We're also 30% nose, so I had already sized up his foot bouquet. It smells less than one day old, indicating an obsessive bather (once a month is typical for canines). I smell baby powder in the sandals, so his poop must come out the toes or heel. On first sniff, he seems OK.

I don't understand why humans dread foot odor. We identify you by your unique tootsie aroma. It's not like we can float in the air and look you in the eye. We're low to the ground and see shoes and feet. I've learned that humans prefer to smell like clean paper towels or bar soap.

The doctor spoke first, ignoring the eye-rolling by Jezzie, "Al, thank you for coming in. This is Ivy. Ivy, this is Al. He is interested in becoming your new master!"

I gave the Jezebel response to suitors who wished to put me in bondage and began to growl. Jezzy smiled and said as she petted me, "That's being a good hard to get Bitch." I looked at her with a puzzled expression, and she purred, "It's OK for us girls to use the word."

She began to ask Al questions from a fifty-item checklist created for prospective dog owners, assuring him that weren't any wrong answers though a pattern of sociopathic abuse or exploitation of animals could be detected using this innovative diagnostic tool. Stan left the room muttering, "This shit's gonna take a while," and indicated that he was going to the back room for coffee.

After the screening a noticeably relieved Al was permitted to pet his potential Empress, as the Gaelic Warrior Queen described me.

Al went down on one knee and began to pet me. "That's good," observed the Irish Protector, "You lowered yourself to her level, that's a sign of respect. The Vet rolled his eyes, and the words "You mean bowing to your majesty" slipped out. The resulting eye contact indicated that a duel to the death would occur after the interview.

Walking me outside on a leash was part of the interview to let Al and I get acquainted. As we walked, both were watching from the window. Stan had an anxious expression while the Celtic "Man Whisperer" studied the scene to catch any little flaw in character. There was some elbowing going on, but I think it's a sign that love/hate was in the air for that combative pair.

When we came back in, Stan asked, "Well, how did it go? Do you think you'd like to adopt Ivy?"

Al replied, "Yes, I think Ivy and I would be good together. I think the growl was because of her past experiences, but I think she'll learn to trust me."

Jezebel said, "The adoption contract specifies that you must keep her groomed. I can recommend a good groomer."

Al shook his head, "Thanks, but I'll take care of that myself."

Her eyes narrowed, "What do you mean?"

"I'm agreeing to take care of Ivy, so I'll bathe and cut her hair myself."

That seemed to soften the crusty Celtic, and she said, "I think you'd do it too. I have no objection to this adoption at this time."

Stan flashed a smile that seemed a bit too big, "As the one with final say, I'm pleased to say that you're Ivy's new owner."

Jezebel bought me a new emerald green leash and collar set with sparkly red spots and, while putting it on me, whispered, "I hope you'll be happy in your forever home. Train him well and if he mistreats you, leave a message at the biggest tree near your new home, and an avenging angel will appear and neuter him."

So, under the all-seeing protection of my Seraph, I began a new life as Al's Tiarna and faithful companion.

End of Episode two

I mentioned charangos. Here’s a picture of mine: It’s a black and white image that was used a few years ago in this blog. The main difference between this and a Uke is the five double coursed strings, and the middle two are tuned to an octave like a twelve string guitar, the rest are unison or the sane note. Because it’s a native made instrument it’s difficult to play but it has a harp-like tone that similar instruments don’t have. I’ve played models that cost almost a thousand but always ended up sticking with this one. I’ll take more about in the next issue in late February.

SOME PREVIEWS OF MY VELLA BOOKS ON AMAZON:

The Boogie Underground Think Tank: How To Survive The End Of Civilization Update

 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0BG6LNXTG

This one is a revival of an old humor column I ran in my old "Delta Snake Blues News" publication in the 90s and 2000s. The slant is about survival in the upcoming hard times, but it really will be topical and cover subjects that are offbeat but relevant. The next one coming in a few days will be "How To Shop For The Perfect Expert," which obviously will be a humorous commentary on the use of experts in general.

The ebook “On The Road With Al & Ivy: The Anthology Volume 1 2016-2018 is now on Kindle Unlimited!

Please check out and listen to my music on Spotify, YouTube, Apple Music and other music sites. Please add any cuts you like to your playlists!