Sunday, January 1, 2023

On The Road With Al And Ivy: A Literary Homeless Chronicle- Jan. 2023



“The good old days were the days, seemingly, when the critics had their way and ran things with a high hand; they made or unmade books and authors. They killed Chatterton, just as, some years later, they hastened the death of Keats. For a time they were all-powerful. It was not until the end of the eighteenth century that these professional tyrants began to lose their grip, and when Byron took up the lance against them their doom was practically sealed.”

- Eugene Field (Love Affairs Of A Bibliomaniac, 1896 - Chapter XIV)



EUGENE FIELD’S THE LOVE AFFAIRS OF A BIBLIOMANIAC, CHURCH’S ILLIAD, DISNEYLAND AND OTHER THOUGHTS:

One of my earliest childhood memories is of two visits to Disneyland. The first time we arrived early and waited in the parking lot. From the outside, it looked a lot like another amusement park that I spent a lot of time at, the Santa Cruz Boardwalk. 

Once we entered, it was noticeably different. The model for the Boardwalk was Coney Island, but here the intent was to create a place where the sights and atmosphere were part of a strange and wonderful fantasyland where a small child could see all the movies and characters come to life. 

Disneyland was like a play with actors and stage props, except that you could ride or live in the scenes.

My favorite was the Nautilus, where one experienced a simulation of the submarine featured in one of my favorite movies, 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea. The giant squid was the obvious highlight.

The early 60s was an innocent era. We were given a booklet of tickets and let loose, and the park was small enough that we could track down our parents if needed.

I never went back. When asked why, my reply was that some memories are best kept like photographs in an album. After reading about all of the new technological wonders and sights, I was impressed but felt that some experiences don't get better just because things get bigger or awe-inspiring.

Part of that is because the Disney experience at the time was a perfect combination of entertainment and living a fantasy. Watching the toy soldiers march about after seeing the movie Babes In Toyland was a different childhood experience.

It was the same for Las Vegas when I got older. I saw it when it was just like in the movie Casino with Robert De Niro, and I preferred that it be my last image of the city. The place certainly got bigger and better, but not classic.

Keep in mind that I'm talking about my own experience, and it's not a judgment about others.

Another entertainment and fantasy world combination is children's books, which ideally stimulate the imagination and for fun.



In his book "The Love Affairs Of A Bibliomaniac, " Eugene Field describes his first love, a book called "The New England Primer." Reading it became a profound entrance into the world of books and held a special spot in his memory.

I had a similar experience in the fourth grade. I loved books by then and had several favorites, but the one that became an obsession was Alfred Church's Iliad (and Odyssey) for young children.

Throughout that school year, I checked it out, renewed it up to the limit, and repeated the cycle repeatedly. It wasn't a popular book, my name was the only one on the library card, and the one time it wasn't there (which smacked of conspiracy) was because it was misplaced. No one would have noticed except I came in every lunch hour asking if it had been found yet.

During that time, I discovered other great characters like Sur-dah, the lion. Still, that year, I just wanted to enjoy that exciting world with the doomed warrior Achilles and the quick-witted Goddess Athena.



Achilles was an interesting psychological character; a man who knew his fate, which was a short life full of glory and ending as a great warrior whose fame would last forever. Only Alexander The Great was more famous. It was a life his mother chose, and his feelings about it were probably quite complex.

That's stuff I didn't know in fourth grade. What fascinated me was that the Gods and Goddesses seemed like humans but with magical powers, and if they liked you, it was like having a Guardian Angel. Having a powerful friend to protect you was a big deal for a kid.

Also, the book depicted a world that seemed more exciting than school, which had necessary but boring routines, and passing tests weren't the same as great deeds by warriors and Gods.

I won't claim that there was a deep purpose in my love of that book or that it helped form a fundamental part of my personality.

Later in life, I found a copy and bought it, but it was clear that it no longer had the same effect. It didn't ruin anything or disappoint, but perhaps as an adult, one moves on to other worlds and realities.

This is why I never visited Disneyland again; there's the part of life that needs exploration and change and some memories that are worth keeping to show that magic happens from time to time.

I stopped trying to find other old children's books for that reason. There's one I mention in my novel, a book about a kid and a dragon who have an adventure in a place full of tangerine trees. Because the main character's imagination has made that fantasy even richer, he has no desire to seek out the book and read it again.

The reason is that the story did what a good book should do, stimulate imagination, and often, the reader will realize that he or she has created a personal version of that world, and it's as real and alive as anything in this world except that you now own it and can live in it anytime. 

It's similar to the effect music can have; sometimes, it's best not to try to explain it. Sometimes there are books that should be revisited, and others to send you on your way to explore the world they helped create.

- Al Handa 
  January 2023




SPECIAL PREVIEW: EXCERPT FROM “JOOK” TO BE PUBLISHED FALL 2023:

I’ve made references in past blog entries to “Jook,” which was started in the 1980s, in my novel as the WIP the main character was working in just prior to becoming homeless. It’s not strictly a epic poem or cycle, there’ll be prose sections that range from conventional narrative to poetic passages. The image above is from William Blake’s illustrated works, which was a big influence on Jook. Many writers like Thackeray and in modern times, Tom Wolfe often did their own illustrations and a work that featured my drawings and graphics appealed to me. I chose Jook to do this as it seemed the most suitable.

The preview is the poem “Elmore James,” and the layout is similar in feel to the actual way it’ll look. I’m holding back the original back until the Fall when the entire work will be published. Take a look and see what you think.






ANTIQUAMANIA BY KENNETH ROBERTS (1928)

It's fitting that one of my rarest books is a first edition copy of Kenneth Roberts' "Antiquemania," a satire on antique collecting written under the pseudonym Professor Milton Kilgallen in 1928 in collaboration with the then famous Authors Booth Tarkington and Joseph Hergesheimer.

Kenneth Roberts' most famous books were Arundel, Rabble In Arms, Oliver Wiswell, and Northwest Passage (later made into a movie starring Spencer Tracy, Robert Young, and a young Walter Brennan).

It's an edited compilation of essays from 1924 on the subject and three authors thinly disguised as fictional characters with a passion for collecting vintage items.

The Internet has made the vintage market into a huge industry, but the passion, appreciation, and occasional instances of foolishness and greed haven't changed, and neither have the reasons people will buy old stuff (which admittedly include yours truly).

I could make a decent sum of money in the early eBay era by combing through bargain bins at book and record stores, often selling my finds for up to 50.00 to 100.00 dollars. That was during a small window of around six months.

After that, everybody was Ebaying, including store staff who'd hold back items to sell. The final sign was seeing people with mobile phones stuck to their ears while checking the shelves and bins. So I got out while the going was good and was satisfied with the vintage instruments I blew my profits on.

I didn't want to continue collecting and selling vintage items after that. I had a regular day job, so the money wasn't the point, and while capitalism is as valid a reason as any to hunt vintage, going to garage sales at 5 am and trying to beat the pack to rare items (at least those left on the floor by staff or owners) isn't the kind of antiquing that appealed to me.

In my mind, you want the item at a great price. There were instruments in my collection worth a lot more than I paid, and it never occurred to me to sell those. Looking for a bargain was about having more treasures for the money.

I don't have many instruments anymore and don't have the resources to buy a lot. There's an old 60s acoustic I found at a pawn shop for 125.00 that is worth up to 900.00, but that valuation only adds to my pleasure, if that makes sense.

Also, as musicians know, each instrument sounds different, and selling the guitar for 900.00 wouldn't necessarily get me another guitar that sounds as good. Newer, but not always better.

As a vintage nut, I prefer mojo and the aura of time. It's an aesthetic as opposed to a standard of quality. My 1902 pocket edition of Last Of The Mohicans is more enjoyable to read than a modern version or eBook. I frankly couldn't tell you why; it just is.

In Kenneth Roberts' book, the three protagonists embark on an expedition of discovery that yields priceless treasures and stretches their patience to the breaking point with endless arguments over the actual value of the finds and respective levels of competence in the collecting field.

It's common knowledge that most of the items in an antique store were bought by the owner at a price that's drastically less than its market value. For example, in used records, the average price was around twenty-five to fifty percent of the sale value of the disc, and in some cases, a lot less if it was destined to be a lower price or bargain bin item.

In other words, there's plenty of room for negotiation (though not as much as in jewelry at a chain store), and many of the comic moments are descriptions of the often brutal haggling. Most of the passionate antics are, of course, by the three buyers who occasionally find themselves in competition for the same item to the smug satisfaction of the antique dealer.

One funny passage has one of the collectors and the dealer acting like they could care less if a deal is made until the former suddenly caves and agrees to the outrageously high price. It's a masterpiece of psychological drama.

Kenneth Roberts' Antiquemania is the older style of satire, which either lampooned the rich and powerful or, in this case, poked a little fun at human foibles but had a warm tone and a liking for the subject. 

That's a subtlety that's all too often missing in modern satire, which is often weaponized to attack or denigrate on the Internet and political conflicts. Satire at its best is a response to power and privilege, not a blunt stick that hits everyone. Again, that's a fine point but a valid one.

This book has never been reprinted and thus has become the thing the author loved so much, a rare old treasure worth hunting down if you love antiques.

Even better, to paraphrase Eugene Fields, I found a great rare book and got it cheap. That made it a pleasure I could afford. Profit isn't everything, even in America.

- Al Handa 
  January 2023



CROWN OF INFINITY BY JOHN M. FAUCETTE (1968 ACE BOOKS)

The first time I read John M. Faucette's "Crown Of Infinity" was in my teens, and it was a case of a book finding me. It still finds its way into my reading list from time to time.

A friend of the family gave us a box of paperback books, which included a large number of the now classic Ace Double pulp science fiction books that featured covers on both sides. The one that caught my attention was Crown Of Infinity, which had a colorful graphic of an epic battle between spaceships. 

There's the old saying that you can't judge a book by its cover, but the spectacular illustration by Kelly Freas drew me in, and I spent an afternoon reading it.

I'll describe a bit of the story as the book isn't easy to find, and it's the kind of pulp Sci-fi book that isn't seen around much these days. I could be wrong; I don't keep track of that sort of thing.

It's a story about a race called the Star Kings, who The Masters decisively defeated. They realized that the Masters were too powerful and decided on a long-term survival strategy until their evolution made victory possible.

They sent out pairs, a male and female, out in every direction, and each capsule buried itself inside various planets, the more distant and obscure, the better, and waited.

The Masters found out and tirelessly hunted the capsules down, but enough were missed that there were plenty of survivors who eventually developed abilities and technologies to challenge their sworn enemy for ascendency.

What amazed me about the story was the time frame, which unfolded over millions of years. The narrative covered this by describing incidents and people at various stages of the, for lack of a better word, quest.

There was one person, for example, who the computers predicted would be a failure but had to try to execute a mission anyway, knowing that it was part of a much larger process. Yet his failure also sowed the seeds for a more significant development that would ultimately put the Star Kings in a position to succeed. That's an ancient theme, with Achilles of the Iliad who lived knowing his time was short.

Faucette's novel can be found on the Internet as a vintage paperback, so I'll avoid giving more information to avoid spoilers.

There are two things about the book that are noteworthy in 2023. One is that the heroes aren't pure "Alpha" types waving light swords or casting spells. The key to survival is a group mentality, and like insects or other species seen as prey, sheer numbers can defeat an attempt to eradicate them.

The other is that it's old school sci-fi, where the various technologies and awareness came out of a writer's imagination and not necessarily an attempt to predict what was possible. That last point is splitting fine hair, but there is a difference between speculating and being prophetic.

My opinion is that the science fiction genre changed a lot in the 60s due to dystopian writers like Phillip K. Dick and later with the emergence of the "High Tech Novel" pioneered by Tom Clancy and others, which featured tech-based stories that emphasized realism.

That's not to say it all changed, as science fiction has become a multitude of subgenres that range from fantasy to attempts to predict future technology. All of which is good, of course.

I was an avid reader of the early High Tech genre, particularly the works of Tom Clancy and Dale Brown, though admittedly drifting off after it got too technical (in my mind).

Phillip K. Dick is also high on my list, though not to the point of reading everything he's ever written. His "Solar Lottery" is one of the most astute depictions of how humans treat luck as ability and fate. It's the most relevant book that describes how Western societies tend to function.

I preferred Crown Of Infinity to Star Wars, for example, and though both are enjoyable, the scope of Faucette's work is fascinating, and the battle scenes read better than the pyrotechnic visuals of the latter.

Probably the same reason I liked Star Trek better, the more cerebral works are more satisfying (to me).

But why choose? Enjoy them all and decide. In my case, I recommend finding Crown Of Infinity (at a reasonable price) and enjoying a story created out of pure imagination and the events on a timeline not constricted by the time limit of a movie.

- Al Handa 
   January 2023




 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0BJC122G7


Special Free Episode 2: Queen Khleo Meets The Legendary Achilles


Once my feet touch the ground, the spell ends, and I'm no longer floating about like the foxy Queen that I am.

I'm in front of Achilles' tent, but don't enter. Like me, he's royalty, King of the Myrmidons, and I can only come in after being announced.

I wait five seconds, which is longer than a gorgeous Queen should have to wait, then scream, "Achilles! Are you fuckin' in there! It's Khleo!"

A slender young man with long blond hair comes to the entrance; my guess is that it's his best bud Patroclus.

He looks at me for a moment, then asks, "Khleo, are you the Trojan prostitute he sent for?"

I peer at him using my Egyptian Snake Eye expression, casting a spell Bastet taught me that makes men feel like everything they say is wrong. As expected, he wilts before my regal presence.

"I am Queen Khleopahtra of Egypt, Daughter of Cat Goddess Bastet and King Moheeto Of Maersbarre, and I have come to see the great warrior and King, Achilles."

A deep basso-profundo voice that sounded just a little sarcastic rang out from inside the tent, "Pat, please see her High-nass in."

We enter, and I'm immediately knocked on my ass by the smell of sweat and stinky feet. Well, I guess after nine years of war, the dudes are going to get a bit ripe.

Achilles takes a good look at me, then, with a sheepish grin, gets up from his chair and says in a polite voice, "Please forgive our rudeness; we Myrmidons are a rough, warlike tribe but do know how to respect others of royal rank. As far as Pat's crack about the prostitute, I put him up to it. My apologies, your highness."

I dipped my head slightly and continued to hold my breath. Losing battle with the smell, I'm afraid.

He steps forward and says in an even tone of voice, "I am Achilles, Son of Peleus, King Of Phthia and Nereid Thetis, one of the Goddesses of water and daughter of the Sea God Nereus."

He pauses, then his eyes seem to catch fire and bellows as if to the heavens,

"Spoiler Alert! I'm also the Greatest Greek Warrior of all time, who is going to frickin' die young in front of the Walls of Troy after that dweeb Paris, The Prince Of Troy, shoots an arrow into my unprotected heel, which that asshole Trojan Loving Almighty Super God Zeus won't let me cover with armor!"

From the shadows in the corner of the tent stepped a small, elderly man, who meekly says, "Great King, you must not anger the Gods, or they'll end your time early."

Achilles smirks, "Not even Zeus can override the fates."

He looks at me, "You may not know him," pointing at the old man, "In a later time, he'll be known as the Poet Homer whose Chronicles will make my ass famous."

I feel puzzled, "Look, I don't want to be rude but aren't you supposed to be blind?"

Homer laughs and says with a twinkle in his small beady eyes, "I'm still building my brand, but yes, my bio does say that."

"Isn't that lying?"

He shrugs, "Well, yeah, but it does add a little pizzazz to the live show if I squint and appear to play my lyre without looking."

Patroclus adds, in a loud whisper, "Don't tell King Menelaus of Sparta; we let him think he's blind. Otherwise, he'll be assigned to latrine duty or something like that."

Homer looks disgusted, "Picture a beach that men have been living on for nine years."

"I don't have to; I can smell it from here."

Achilles nodded, "It's pretty raucous."

Homer held his small hands up, "As long as we're all here, and have a royal guest; perhaps I can debut the new opening for my Iliad?"

Achilles perks up, "Sure, let 'er rip, poet dude!'

Homer looks as if he's gathering his thoughts, then chants in a melodious voice,

"Fuckin' A, Oh Sing Goddess of the righteously pissed Achilles who kicked ass upon the Achaians, hurling them all ass over tits to Hades to be munched on by ravenous dogs and birds to satisfy the will of Zeus!"

Achilles and Patroclus stood there silently for a moment. The young buddy of the Great Myrmidon King spoke first, "I like the words, man, but I think that it should be a bit more heavy and poetic."

Achilles nodded, "I think the 'Fuckin' A' at the beginning is great, it's like a great lyre riff that opens a rocking metal song, but I think the next line should talk more about my awesomely buff biceps."

Homer adds with a laugh, "The muscular arm wielding the mighty spear of Achilles!"

The two warriors giggled, then Patroclus says, "You can take that any number of different ways!"

Homer interjects, "Well, it's been nine years!"

I roll my eyes. Wow, these guys are such a bunch of jocks!

I patiently wait until the boys, I mean men, stop guffawing and ask, "Is there going to be a battle today?"

Achilles shrugs, "Actually, I don't know. When we first got here, we rumbled every day, but after the eighth year, it was getting monotonous."

Patroclus added, "Plus, the Gods keep interfering and saving their favorites from death in battle. It's getting to be like a Pro Wrestling match with all the fake fighting."

"And I should add," Achilles said, "That's pissing me off because I'm supposing to be having a short rock and roll life kicking Trojan ass, and there's that Geek-ass Paris, looking down at me from the wall, pointing to his bow and arrow and making faces at me."

I shake my head, "Shouldn't he avoid giving away the ending?"

Achilles nods, "I've talked to Athena about it; she says Zeus promises to talk to him but never does."

"Well, maybe my mom knows Athena? I could see if she could work something out or give me a spell that'll shut the guy up?"

Achilles smiles, "Hey, that'd be great if you could."

Just then, the air fills with the sound of trumpets! Looks like a battle today!

Achilles calls out to his servants, "Bring me my armor! Yeah, the one with the unprotected heel!"

He turns to me, "If you can fly, you can join the other Gods and Goddesses watching the battle, it'll be pretty crowded, but you should have a good view of the party!"

Then with a bow, he adds, "If this is 'arrow in the fucking heel day,' you'd think they'd tell me when it'll happen, then it was nice talking to you and give my regards to your mother."

Then with the mighty cry, "Cowabunga!" The two warriors leave with Homer scurrying in tow, clutching his pen and paper.

I lift one of my dainty feet, feel the breeze lift me into the air, and float out after them to watch the mighty Achilles in battle!

END OF EPISODE…




The Forbidden Lost Gospels Of Murgatroyde

Special Free Episode 3: The Ancient Origin Of The Word “Mansplaining”


Human nature hasn't evolved much over time. What has changed is each generation develops terminology to describe behaviors that have existed since the dawn of civilization, which began once humankind no longer needed their brains to survive.

The word "mansplaining" is a relatively new word that describes a man explaining something to a woman condescendingly. It's how men have historically talked to women (and each other, actually), but after thousands of years of it, women became sick of that shit and gave it a name.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of Professor Ivy of Shitzu U, the ancient origins of the term were discovered on the back of an antique Sumerian cereal box that was accidentally listed on Craiglist and purchased by the Shitzu U Archive of Super Old Stuff department.

The furry Professor was able to date the document by translating the cuneiform on the boxtop, which roughly translates to "Best enjoyed before 123,45,7895 B.C.," which she estimated was about 50 years ago. 

The revelatory document on the back of the vintage carton describes the first instance of mansplaining, which was then called "haec est satura et non gravis historia." It roughly translates to the phrase "How apex dudes talk to a social inferior whose ass they can kick."

The knowledgeable Barking Scholar does note that her translation isn't precise as some of the Sumerian words have no English equivalent, so the term "socially inferior" could also mean females or red meat eaters, depending on the pronunciation or political leaning of the speaker.

As you can see, not much has changed. Still, the practice of mansplaining back then was, as the floppy-eared scholar says, "A privilege that only the Emperor enjoyed, and such divine words from the living God was often accompanied by torture."

Moreover, the good Professor adds that it was applied equally to both men and women, though it was rare for the latter to enjoy the royal favor as most were kept locked up and out of sight until around 1962.

In the concluding summary of Ivy's Treatise, "Men Can Be Paper Trained," the following observations and conclusions were made:

On the female side, the term for a man who uses an explanation to denigrate a woman is a mansplainer.

On the male side, a selection of the numerous equivalent terms includes "Karen," B---h, nag, harridan, uppity, Jezebel, witch, catty, or Eve.

The reason that men have so many useful terms to denigrate a woman who tries to mansplain is that they've been speaking out of turn longer, and, boys being boys, language became a way to settle masculine disputes when an area to engage in fisticuffs wasn't available, or one of the parties was a scardy cat who wanted to go hide behind his mother's apron. 

In the latter case, which was painful for all good men to witness, the man with the bigger feathers or growled louder would establish domination and start rubbing it in, then with the kind heart that all apex kings of the jungle possess, would then deliver a humiliating reprimand to, as men would say, "Force the woosy to man up for his own good." 

Such is the crowning mercy of a true mansplainer!

So before 1923, the main people who mewed criticism of mansplaining were the 99.9999 percent of the male population who were physically and emotionally dominated by their betters and didn't like it any more than women did in modern times but had to put up with it unless they were willing to trade butchy blows in old fashioned trial by combat. 

Since most men were raised to take orders from superior studs, there were no complaints about this egalitarian system until women began to speak up.

The actual term mansplaining wasn't used until 19213 A.D. when men were shocked to discover that women weren't voice-activated and could indeed speak and, after being given the right to vote, had to be talked to just like any other man.

Which for females, of course, meant being mansplained, except that the Apex Rulers of Bro Culture gave all men the right to perform this act with women to provide a salve for the bruised egos that are endemic to those who are expected to take crap from their betters.

Also, the unofficial Congress of Bros in 19330 A.D. passed the "Statute Of Mansplain," which restricted women to that one word. It required terms like womanizer, selfish lover, minute rice, small penis owner, fart machine, toilet seat bandit, mama's boy, Peter Pan, butt grabber, titty hawk, one week with same socks and shorts, adulterer, and similar descriptive definitions to remain as terms of endearment and such men to be considered cute and irresistible to babes.

The U.S. Constitution and Bill Of Rights, passed in 1776 but still haven't been ratified by the Internet, specify that mansplaining is protected speech. Any woman using that label can be safely ignored by any man with real cajones, as a woman's right to be listened to is still stuck in some obscure committee in Congress, and thus, as with a tree falling the forest, it's not clear to men that the term is even spoken aloud, though accounts on Conspiracy Web Sites assert that it is part of the secret Feminine language Professor Ivy describes in her Autobiography on Kindle Vella, and the first three chapters are free across all devices.

In conclusion, Professor Ivy states in her monumental tome, "Litter Boxes Are For Sissies," that "Though the emergence of the term mansplaining has liberated women and men who can't stand up for themselves, the evil within is a voracious beast that hides and comes out to prey upon our primordial instincts and makes us eat bread with gluten and too much sugar."

[Note: I'm not sure what Ivy's last quote means. It was written by Mimee, The A.I. Blog Generator, after inputting the term "Inspiring Literary Closing Statement." I'm not sure the late Professor would know either, but it's assumed the algorithm scraped examples of her works to create the admittedly florid conclusion. Please address all questions and trolling to Mimee]

Vella Link To All Episodes:



BE SURE TO CHECK OUT THE DELTA SNAKE REVIEW ON THIS SAME SITE!










Here's an update on each of my Vella books:




The Quitters


https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B09PC3L6PC


It's the first book, and after ten months, it's finally developing an audience, and the stats are trending upward this month. I think it's due to the blog and the new book/music video short format I'm using for its promotion. I’ve moved the plot lines away from potentially over technical descriptions of playing live to more emphasis on the personalities and in particular, the main character Nym. Also, some of the romance elements are now coming into play.


It's at 31 episodes, though as an ebook, we're talking maybe 15 traditional-length chapters. I'm keeping the format episodic and short, kind of like a weekly TV show, which works for Vella but will need to be restructured for the ebook.




I, Ivy


 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0B3RCBT4D


The story got off to a decent start, but I didn't notice that as it's obvious now that the daily totals on the Vella dashboard can differ or not jibe with the monthly or overall total, which have to be accurate as those numbers determine the royalty and bonus payouts. I'll be paying more attention to this one in November, as it’s being read more than I thought. The latest chapter, Ivy’s view of the efforts by a human to give her a pill should strike a familiar chord.


This is a new one, though it'll be the most familiar to blog readers. I'll be changing the format of the blog in November, and putting the Lost Gospels here will allow me to fully expand that line of humor and satire in a way that simply being a blog feature doesn't permit.




The Boogie Underground Think Tank: How To Survive The End Of Civilization


 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0BG6LNXTG


This one is a revival of an old humor column I ran in my old "Delta Snake Blues News" publication in the 90s and 2000s. The slant is about survival in the upcoming hard times, but it really will be topical and cover subjects that are offbeat but relevant. The next one coming in a few days will be "How To Shop For The Perfect Expert," which obviously will be a humorous commentary on the use of experts in general.



The ebook “On The Road With Al & Ivy: The Anthology Volume 1 2016-2018 is now on Kindle Unlimited!

I’ll run free promotions later this month, but members can read it for free now.


Please check out and listen to my music on Spotify, YouTube, Apple Music and other music sites. Please add any cuts you like to your playlists!









Sunday, December 25, 2022

The Delta Snake Review: A Music And Arts Blog By Al Handa



Note: The following content is for entertainment purposes only and some parts are works of satire.

IN THIS ENTRY:

- New! Did 70s Disco Really Suck?
- New! Some Thoughts On AI Art
- Gear Talk From The Archive: Review Of 2004 Fender MIM Nashville Telecaster
- Archive Review From 2014: Classic 60s Album Review - Paul Butterfield Blues Band “East-West”
- New! Short Takes on Rap, Blues, and African Music
- The Boogie Underground Think-Tank: How To Find The Perfect Expert For All Occasions!



DID ‘70s DISCO REALLY SUCK?

In every era, great thinkers add to The Pantheon of Slogans that provide hope and inspiration to aid humanity's never-ending quest to combine intelligent thought with the ability to walk on two legs. But, as the Internet has proven, this melancholy crusade is a work in progress.

In Ancient times, a Carpenter from Gallalee said, "Love your brother and don't interfere with Caesar's business."

In the Renaissance, a poor son of a peasant became the first artist to feature nude scenes in art, saying, "The leaf covers the brain of man."

In the Victorian Age, a great Monarch instructed all women who distressed their male masters by secretly imagining adulterous love with Jaime in the Outlander Series to "Just close your eyes and think of England."

In World War II, General MacArthur established the day-after-Christmas ritual with his pungent exhortation, "I Shall Return!"

In the tumultuous 60s, forward-thinking minds who tried to increase brain activity by growing long hair and pondering the meaning of album liner notes cried, "Revolution Now!"

The March Of Civilization reached its apex in the 70s when humankind yearned for a return to the salubrious days of Satan-worshipping song lyrics and sticking one's head into P.A. columns during concerts with the battle cry, "Disco Sucks!"

The Disco Sucks Movement was a reaction against the woosy decadence of silk shirts with Chinese Dragon designs, platform shoes, and guys with gell in their hair getting all the beautiful women instead of rockers with boots, spandex, and cheap hairspray in their hair getting all the beautiful women.

As you can see, the battle line was a stark contrast in style, fashion, and male prerogative.

However, the issues of this bitterly fought war became blurred as even the standard bearers of rock and roll took short vacations from the demands of artistic integrity to push out a quickie four beats to the bar anthems for the platform shoe crowd for a quick buck. 

The question that all of you are probably asking, besides the subject's relevance to anyone under the age of 30, is, "What was Disco?"

The long answer one can look up on Google and hash out the mean in the various contradictory theories, which could provide a pleasant break from killing people in RPG video games and still being butthurt over the Game Of Thrones ending (I feel your pain my brothers and sisters).

I'll provide a short answer for the purposes of this essay.

Assume it's the definitive explanation until you reach the end of this penetrating meditation and have formed the opinion that I'm too old to write about music.

Disco didn't appear out of the blue; it'd been around since D.J.s and dance clubs came into being and has never gone away. It's still alive and well in various permutations, which escapes the notice of old farts because the audience is in the 20-30 age range, and nobody ever really knows what their kids are doing or listening to.

The 70s version of Disco came out of the New York Gay Dance Club Scene and featured the traditional pounding 4/4 beat with whatever was in style on top.

The Disco movement became supercharged by the surprise success of the movie Saturday Night Fever which, like with Elvis in the 50s, the Industry managed to get everyone to adore a straight white male hero, and that got the cash registers ringing like church bells on Sunday.

That led to the rise of bands and artists such as the Bee Gees, K.C. and The Sunshine Band, Donna Summer, Tramps, Ohio Players, and Rick Dees with his infamous "Disco Duck" song.

That's an oversimplification, but accurate enough for my sacred mission to illuminate hard-hitting truths without wasting time on actual research.

There are two reasons why rock and roll audiences reacted with such hostility to Disco. Of course, there are more than two, but let's not test your patience.

The most important was that these immaculately coifed and dressed artists began to suck up all the P.R. oxygen and profit from sensitive singer-song writers and heavy metal studs; thus driving up the price of cocaine to unsustainable levels and forcing them to play music with a simple dance beat with even less than three chords to compete.

Needless to say, the spandex rockers resented being out dumb downed by the silk shirt upstarts who often didn't even feature guitars, much less an actual band, in the music.

Plus, the sophisticated clothes and Gay origins of 70s Disco may not have played well to the mullet-haired males that made up a large percentage of the audience in a typical metal concert.

That's admittedly an unscientific observation, but strict stickling to details doesn't belong in an article about rock music anyway.

The Disco Sucks Movement reached its zenith when protestors began burning huge piles of disco records or destroying said discs in public displays of righteous indignation, which was OK with major Labels as long as the stuff was paid for. They didn't care what anyone did with the product once they got their money. 

The Disco Sucks movement suffered a setback when major Rock and Punk groups started coming out with Disco crossover singles. However, rage soon turned to reassurance and approval once fans realized that their heroes made lots of money on the hits. Americans are generous and quick to forgive selling out as long as it's successful, which is the bedrock of Democracy and The American Way.

Rock artists who recorded these thumping anthems for the glitter ball set helped the healing process by instructing their publicists to issue sincere statements of regret about the regrettable lapse of artistic integrity and commitment to that old-time rock and roll.

Indeed, the protectors of the sweaty standard of stadium rock returned to basics and staunchly held the line of uncompromising purity until the 80s, when it became necessary to wear even more eye makeup and add cheap synthesizers to the music.

- Al Handa 
  Dec. 2022



SOME THOUGHTS ON AI ART

The hype surrounding A.I. Art obscures the fact that historically the effect of new tech innovations creates a wide range of results, from outright failures, a significant middle ground of mediocrity, and about the same percentage of genius, which is maybe one in a million or less.

The development of AI Art won't kill human beings like self-driving cars or create processes like autocorrect, which makes writing as easy as putting on makeup or cooking from scratch. Still, it's good to remember that the real-world effect will be as good or bad as humans allow, and it isn't inevitable that AI will take over the world on its own.

There will always be apocalyptic types (and artists are among the most enthusiastic) who assert that the end of the world is coming and AI will find a way if an asteroid doesn't do it.

...back on track...

That being said, I'll return to the subject at hand and resist the temptation to add my thoughts about the End Of Days. Instead, I refer you, good readers, to my Vella series, "The Boogie Underground Think-Tank: How To Survive The End Of Civilization," for the definitive word on our impending doom.

... it's tough being an artist...

What makes it more challenging for artists is that AI software is kinda sorta protected from liability (that is, the Internet sites that control distribution like YouTube, etc.) because of the fear that intrusive regulation stifles innovation.

...the primary issue...

What appears to be the primary issue with this new tech, besides its theoretical ability to kill us or turn us into enslaved people, is that it must "scrape" the Internet to educate itself enough to crank out the requestor's desired product.

It's already legally established what would happen to a human being who does the same thing; they'll probably get sued if any attempt to make a profit out of an overly derivative work without permission or license.

...not perfect ..

It's not a perfect process. For example, it's almost impossible to prevent merchandise sales with unauthorized images completely, and products often get copied using reverse engineering to evade patents.

These days, one can create an illustration in the "Warhol" or "Modern Art" style in most graphic editors, and genre writing like SciFi or Romance can have similar elements in books by different authors.

On the one hand, there are only so many ways to describe a spaceship or sex scene, but historically, there'll be rare geniuses who find a new, unique way (who, in turn, will be imitated).

...derivatives...

The use of derivative elements is more evident in the visual arts. If you're copying Mickey Mouse, people will know it's Mickey Mouse. Copying the famous rodent is legal as long as you don't try to sell it. AI Art software won't change that; even if it can replicate on a scale no human can, none of it can be sold (legally).

Where it can harm is if it copies elements like style and other unique aspects of art created by humans.

...window of opportunity...

The important thing for an artist who creates an original work is that there's a finite window of opportunity to profit from it. After that, the work is created, builds an audience, and hopefully is a financial success. 

That's a process that AI can disrupt. A new artist who begins to find an identity can discover that the scraping process can assimilate and co-opt those unique elements into a current commercial project.

That's why the US Copyright office is wise not to allow registration of AI-created artwork. There would inevitably be people who'd game the system (like with patent farming and domain squatting) and scour the Internet to collect unique artistic elements and combine those into copyrighted art (one step ahead of artists who don't have the resources to protect their work). 

...scraping...

Scraping isn't going to hurt Stephen King or Taylor Swift, and AI Art software will undoubtedly benefit a lot of art departments and artists producing functional or commissioned works.

There's also no doubt that AI software will and does give millions of people pleasure with the ability to edit their photos and art in an almost unlimited number of ways. So it's a capability that's here to stay.

However, suppose you are an artist who works to create a unique new vision that no one's ever seen. In that case, there might come a time when it's best to complete the work offline and keep it that way even when marketing it because there'll be AI software beating the Internet bushes for the inspiration it'll never have on its own. 

The need to give those developing AI the room to innovate may stifle human genius and creativity that makes new art possible and limit it to technically amazing feats of mediocrity.



GEAR REVIEW: 2004 FENDER MIM NASHVILLE TELECASTER

Archive From September 2014

The 2004 Fender MIM Nashville Telecaster ended up in my collection the same way more than one guitar has ended up in someone's collection; I was using the Nashville to test out amplifiers and bought it instead.

It wasn't so much an impulse buy as it was fate. I had been in the market for a second tele, and the Mexican-made Nashville was one of the models I was watching. The most familiar is the one with the semi-hollow body, but when I was looking for a guitar to check out some amplifiers, I saw the solid body version on the rack.

As you can see from the picture, it looks like a standard, except it has a Stratocaster pickup in the middle. The selling point is that you have a telecaster and Stratocaster combined in one guitar.

That is only technically true.

Putting a strat pickup in the middle does give you some Strat-like tones, but as a general rule, most strat players rarely use the middle pickup (by itself). Of course, the fact that most don't could be a good reason for you to go ahead and do that. Why follow the crowd?

One legendary telecaster player, Clarence White, who was most famous as a member of the late 60s Byrds, put a strat pickup in the front neck position. It was an effective mod that produced a very useful tone, and the "twisted pair" pickups in some recent Standards give the player a similar sound.

The MIM Nashville is one of the more admired Mexican-made teles from Fender. From what I can see on the Internet, most of those who own one love it.

To a small extent, the main point of controversy is the Tex-Mex pickups. Those are like the ones used for the telecaster and strat standards, except that the wire coils around the magnet have extra winds to create a "hotter" sound. Though in guitar terms, that doesn't necessarily mean more fierce sounding. Just a little fuller.

I bought it based on how it sounded in the store instead of researching it first on the Internet and ordering it. It was a good reminder of the basic rule of guitar buying: to trust your ears and not what people say.

I didn't know there were "Tex-Mex" pickups on that guitar. I wouldn't have even taken the guitar off the rack if I had known that. One of the strats I once owned (and didn't keep) had the Tex-Mex. I hated the sound and returned it to the store within a week.

Add to that the small but vocal chorus of bad-mouthing that goes on about those pickups on the Internet, and you have a guitar that I would generally avoid. Actually, I should've known better. My first telecaster was a '73 Standard that I played for 25 years. It had a rewound front pick up, in other words, what they now call a Tex-Mex.

That was the first thing I realized while playing the guitar at the store. The front pickup sounded like the one on my old telecaster. I generally used it because my old CBS-era telecaster had a crappy bridge pickup, and I preferred the sound of it with the treble turned up.

If you listen to those few songs where I played the solo or lead guitar in the Handa-McGraw & The Internationals recordings, that's the sound of the rewound front pickup (on an old small amp with gain and volume high). In the previous Delta Snake Review, I provided a list of those links on YouTube.

The general word on the Nashville deluxe is that it has a hotter or "darker" sound and won't give you the "traditional" twang. By traditional sound, I mean that thinner 50s sound on old country records. By the same token, the term has lost its meaning. Fender's been making telecasters for over 60 years, most of which have certain things in common regarding tone, but there's no longer any such thing as a single classic sound.

The Fender Nashville Deluxe is Mexican-made, though most parts were manufactured in the United States and sent down to Mexico for assembly. In the case of my candy apple red version, it has an alder wood body and a maple fretboard.

The neck profile is a "modern C" or "fast neck," meaning it's a little slimmer. I have small hands, so that's a desirable feature. The basic hardware, like the bridge and pegs, is good enough. I've heard some criticism about those metal parts, but these tuners are better than the ones I had on my old '73.

The heart of the electronics is the three-pickup configuration, with the middle pickup being a strat type. The two Tex-Mex's sound like standard telecaster pickups except a bit fuller, basically as advertised. If you want to sound a little sharper and thinner like a standard, I'm sure you can adjust the tone on any decent amp.

While electric guitars haven't changed much due to the conservatism of most guitar buyers, amplifier technology has always advanced quickly. In fact, it would be moving even faster if it wasn't for the fact that most of the older guitar players want amplifiers that duplicate the old vintage sounds. How amplifier makers responded to that demand is a story in itself.

I can say that these telecaster pickups will give you the old twangy sound, the classic front pickup jazz sound, and a great blues tone. If you have a decent amp, it can produce pretty much any tone. The middle Strat pickup on the Nashville works very well. It sounds like a strat pickup that's closer to the neck (your ears might hear it differently).

Another thing about this telecaster is that it has a five-position switch instead of the traditional three. So you can combine the bridge and middle, and middle and neck, but to the anguish of many traditionalists, you can't combine the bridge and neck pickups.

That neck and bridge combination isn't one that I used very much, but plenty of telecaster players do. In the early 70s, you would've been SOL, but we live in an era where you can easily have the front and back setting installed or even do it yourself.

Suppose you want the "standard" telecaster tone. In that case, you'd probably be better off buying one of the standards, if for no other reason that you won't have musicians looking at your Nashville and psychologically not being able to hear a standard-type tone.

When I was in the store, there was a standard American Tele on the rack next to this one for only $300 more, but after trying it, I felt that it didn't sound $300 better. I've owned a couple of other American standards, one I would say sounded better than this Nashville, the other nowhere near as good. That may sound strange to those who don't play guitar, but most musicians know what I'm talking about.

The Fender Nashville deluxe telecaster has been one of its more successful Mexican models, and given what I've seen of it, it's probably one of the best values in the midprice range. So if you can find a used one at a good price, it'll be both a bargain and a keeper.

Note: The used price in 2014 was 350.00. 

In my case, I've found a telecaster with a front pick up that sounds like my old '73, which is priceless.


Note 2022: This review was written in the 90s and was part of the Delta Snake "Classic 60's Blues Album" series of reviews. It was republished online in 2014 and now, in 2022, edited down from its original length.


It's a special piece to me, as one of the founding members of the Butterfield Blues Band, Mark Naftalin, took an interest in the review and looked over early drafts. He gave me a great deal of feedback and backstories, which increased my insight into the album, and my conversations with him about the album are some of my fondest memories from that time. Mark was a generous person with his time and insights.


For that reason, I've made very few edits, only where there were obvious grammar mistakes. I wanted to leave the review basically as Naftalin saw it published.


CLASSIC 60'S BLUES ALBUM REVIEW: EAST-WEST by The Butterfield Blues Band


Note: You'll notice that many songs are discussed out of order as the review unfolds. The reason is that I wanted the review to follow the flow of my discussion and because the most influential changes often come from particular songs, not entire albums.


I owe a lot of thanks to one of the founding members, Mark Naftalin. He looked at the early drafts and offered many critical and helpful comments about the text. But, of course, the final opinions are my own and don't necessarily reflect Mark's view of this classic recording.


The Paul Butterfield Blues Band's "East-West" recording is one of the most important 60's era records, particularly in its effect on other musicians.


Given Mike Bloomfield's charisma at the time, particularly after their work with Dylan, they could have become rock stars. As it was, many later guitar greats like Carlos Santana (who stated it in an interview) admired Bloomfield, who was probably the first of the 60s American "Guitar Heroes," and as a side note, one of the guitarists who popularized the use of the Gibson Les Paul in rock.


Instead, the Band moved into more intricate jazz and modal territory, with at least one step into popular rock. It wasn't a sound that evolved in the often insular blues world. Instead, it was as much a part of The Times as the San Francisco psychedelic bands and, in many ways, predated and anticipated what happened later in the 60s.


Their awareness of the outside world differentiated them from all of the young blues bands of the day. Instead, the Butterfield Blues Band took the blues and related to the music as younger musicians aware of rock and jazz would have. The East-West record clearly shows a band aware of modal scales, jazz of all types, New Orleans R&B, and rock.


One change was Sam Lay's replacement on drums, a genius of a drummer named Billy Davenport. While Sam's work on the first album was superb, Davenport had a flexibility that could only come from a drummer who understood rhythm as a "pulse," providing propulsion as opposed to a beat, very much in the jazz sense.


It may be a digression, but it's interesting to briefly look over what happened in 1966 when East-West came out. Folk-rock was becoming big, the Jefferson Airplane was a harmony folk-rock band, the Beach Boys and the Byrds were beginning their periods of adventuresome work, and Miles Davis was Exploring modal-based jazz that seemed more straightforward on the surface but had a concept of space and time that became highly influential. The Beatles and Stones were turning everyone's idea of what a rock group was upside down.


The English Blues scene was splitting into a traditional faction exemplified by early Fleetwood Mac and John Mayall and an experimental one typified by the Yardbirds. By the late '60s, many of the above trends and ideas had merged...long improvisational jams based on interpretations of Coltrane, Miles, Sitar music, and other influences could be heard everywhere. Music seemed more "serious" but freer.


But back in 1966, there was "East-West." As you listen to the title cut, "East-West," and follow the changes in dynamics over its 13-minute length, one realizes that this work was visionary. One can see the entire gamut of jazz, modalisms, and even San Francisco psychedelic.


I've begun discussing what was the album closer first, but we do have the advantage of hindsight, and that cut did become the most famous and influential. The title cut was also a microcosm of the changes in the Band's sound. Gone was the straight-ahead attack of the first release. In its place was a complexity that wasn't always apparent on the surface. A careful listen will reveal a complex jazz-like undercurrent. It had a rhythm track that could have accommodated a multitude of ideas and tonalities. Instead, it made the various improvisations that followed work like a seamless flow of related ideas.


Elvin Bishop took the first solo and opened with the fieriest of the improvisations. Although not as technically adept as Bloomfield, his solo was more aggressive. His ideas and riffs were more straightforward, with a lot of attack, and on the surface, could strike the listener as showing less understanding of the modal concepts being explored. One thing is obvious...his solo works well as pure sound. The distorted riffs had tonal ideas that wouldn't have been out of place on an early 70's jazz-rock album. Although Bishop's solo is rooted in rock and blues, it still sounds fresh, and more so today.


At the time, Bloomfield's work tended to get the most attention, but to these ears, Bishop's work was just as integral to the arrangement's success. It is hard to quantify and put into words, but the best way to say it is that it is his energy that draws you into the song.


Butterfield's harp solo comes next, and he amplifies the sonic attack with which Bishop opened the song. The harp tone is aggressive, and as it unfolds, it comes across as a series of sharp, rapid ideas. At times, the music would seem to call for a fast flurry of notes (as in a traditional blues solo). Still, he would reverse practice and follow a trail upwards, then explore the tonal microtones and subtleties of a particular note or chord.


One could imagine that Butterfield may have shared a closer bond with Bishop than with Bloomfield (Bishop being the original guitarist in the Band). It shows in the music. The two solos sound as if they were built from the same mindset.


Bloomfield comes in next, and his cleaner tone and rapid-fire ideas are an ideal change in dynamics. His solo builds impressively, and the modal explorations show us a guitarist who seems exhilarated at discovering and exploring new and freer territory. Bishop's guitar comes back in, and the two build up to a peak that once again becomes almost pure tone and sound. One would be hard-pressed to find a better example of such pure sonic beauty, all the more remarkable for being created in 1966 by what was known as a blues band.The peak then subsides, and the rest of the song builds from a series of ideas that, at least on record, anticipate the "spacy jams" of the San Francisco bands.


One other significant departure in the group sound was not of the intellectual or theoretical variety. For whatever reason, the Band also covered a song by Mike Nesmith was, at the time, a member of the famous pop group the Monkees. The Band wasn't aware of this as the song was submitted to them by the publisher in the usual way songs are looked at and evaluated for a new album in demo form. 


Anyway...the song was "Mary, Mary," which many rock critics considered a good one. It is a remarkable and successful rock-blues experiment that still sounds as good as any modern blues artist has done since. The arrangement, originally a riff-song in its pop form, is done here as a darker piece, using a heavier guitar opening with harp and piano counterpoint. It was an arrangement that owes much of its success to Naftalin, an excellent keyboardist.


The other extended number on the record is "Work Song," which shows a jazz sensibility in the sound. It covers a wide range of approaches, which include the theme played in stop time, a succession of solos with ever more intricate and wild overlaps, and rhythm breaks on the downbeat of the final theme. It flows a lot better than I describe it. Bloomfield's use of the telecaster as a jazzy guitar in this song is something I wish other musicians would do more often. His solo builds and climaxes with octave runs, which in 1966 was a rare technical effect in the blues. If you love Albert Collin's "Highway is Like A Woman," you'll understand what I'm talking about.


Naftalin contributes organ work that is both adept and beautifully conceived. One interesting aspect is that he uses a lighter, cooler tone than the funkier Hammond sound of the day. It may not have come across as powerful as a Jimmy Smith number on the Hammond organ, but the more relaxed tone sounds more modern and hasn't dated.


Bishop's solo is the final one. It's interesting to hear him here and in later cuts, as it contrasts strongly with the Southern and Goodtime rock and roll he later did in the 70s (with considerable success, I might add).


One of the most robust jazz-flavored songs, yet firmly rooted in blues, is "Two Trains Running." It opens with a unison riff, hard bop style, and the shuffle rhythm that follows moves forward with an energy that reminds me of Art Blakey or Cannonball Adderly (who did some pretty fine blues also when he was in the mood).




PAUL BUTTERFIELD BLUES BAND (FIRST ALBUM)

The record opens with the Robert Johnson classic "Walkin' Blues" and features the arrangement that became one of the definitive versions. Nowadays, most rock and blue bands use that same march rhythm that drives the cut along. Perhaps this version isn't as well known as Elmore's "Dust My Broom arrangement," but Johnson was rarely covered better.


Next comes "Get Out Of My Life, Woman," performed about as flawlessly as you can. Most versions go hard on the rhythm and use a hard funk approach. In this case, the Band decided to lay back a touch, and the result is dramatic for such a small change. Davenport and Arnold's work is superb. Laying back on the rhythm made it an ideal keyboard song, and Naftalin's work here is the backbone of the arrangement. His right-hand work interacts with the rhythm section perfectly, and his fills and melody give the music a sophistication that will appeal to a modern listener even today.


"I've Got A Mind To Give Up Living" is a slow blues, done ballad style. Paul sings with great power and a natural sense of emotion that makes it classic. A cut that still sounds great now. Also, the way the piano and guitars interact and combine to create a single chord at some points is impressive. "All These Blues" turns the tempo up and is a chugging style of blues. Like the song before, the keyboards and guitars are used as an ad-hoc horn section. Butterfield's harp solo cuts through and combines with vocals in a call-and-response manner. Each musical phrase sounds perfect and focused.


"Work Song," Mary, Mary," and "Two Trains Running" follow and have already been discussed in detail. 


Next up is "Never Say No." It's called (by its author Percy Mayfield) "Never Say Naw." It's a quiet number in the "Tin Pan Alley" mold, but done like, say, Mose Allison would have done it. The general mood is atmospheric, and the Band's playing is understated. It should also be noted that this was Elvin's first recorded vocal and a fine debut.


The set ends with "East-West," and its placement is ideal. It's as if all the changes and subtle touches throughout the work led to this point. It's one of the greatest album-closers of all time. As time passes, I think there has been and will be an awareness that the blues underwent many changes during the '60s that were as momentous as any that occurred in the 50s. At the forefront of that change was the Butterfield Blues Band. What they did with the blues makes the Band's music so great. They chose exploration, change, and, most of all, the idea that the blues was an expression of the times.


In this, they were akin to the great explorers in the jazz scene.


- Al Handa

  May 2014




BLUES AND RAP MUSIC

I planned to include a 2014 essay on Rap and Blues from the archives but realized that it would be better to write a new piece which should run later this month or in February.

Rap and Blues are very different genres on the surface, but from a musical standpoint, the two, during their early stages, are very similar in structure. Both started as improvised street poetry/lyrics sung over a beat or "vamp."

The main reason that old blues records from the 20s-30s seem like short songs with set arrangements was due to the limitations of the recording technology at the time. In reality, most blues songs were performed live as longer improvisational pieces with lyrics that covered a wide range of subjects and were made up on the spot for a particular audience.

Blues artists in that era were as heavily criticized as modern Rap artists were, and the mainstream church openly characterized the blues as "Devil's Music" played by musicians on a fast track to Hell.

The history of Blues was bowdlerized in the 60s, and the audience became predominantly white for various reasons. As a result, the subject matter of the lyrics narrowed. Still, in the 20s, nothing was out of bounds and included hundreds of topics, including Gay and lesbian themes, politics, and historical events.

The bluesmen lived tumultuous lives that paralleled Gangsta Culture and would be viewed similarly now.

The subject will be covered in a series, as it's a complex subject worth examining in detail.

AFRICAN MUSIC

Americans can be provincial about their Music and assume it's the only big thing in the world, but there are stars in other countries that can fill a stadium and create Music that even influences artists here.

The rest of the world does love rock and roll and welcomes those acts, but it can inadvertently come off as America spreading its modern culture and not what it is, which is that people in other countries are often more open-minded about Music.

For example, one of my favorite genres is African Music, and my group, Handa-McGraw International, does some. In fact, one of our numbers that get the most streams is "Madagascar Summer," a guitar and percussion piece that stems from my admiration for D'Gary, a singer and guitarist from Madagascar.

One of the essays coming up in the future is a survey of African Music that focuses on guitar. I might do that one in parts, as there are many regional differences.


- Al HANDA



SAMPLE EPISODE: HOW TO FIND THE PERFECT EXPERT FOR ALL OCCASIONS!

One of the critical decisions that we all must make to survive the end of civilization is choosing the right experts to guide us in such dark times, and indeed, for many, to be told how and what to think!

To the savvy doomsday shopper, the best expert is the one who will validate your cherished prejudices and ego at a fair price.

The right sage will express your sentiments in the best and most persuasive way, like finding the perfect greeting card or flipping someone off while in a moving vehicle.

The right expert opinion, backed by impressive credentials, will add lots of power and credibility to even the most fallacious or silly assertions, amaze the gullible, or pique the interest of those who'd otherwise ignore your banal statements.

That isn’t the same thing as hiring a publicist. No matter how smooth or adroit the prepared statement, people will still know it’s still you talking. You’re renting the expert’s credibility, not merely dressing up your ignorance or self-interest.

It's not wise to promiscuously trust any old expert. In past eras, such esteemed final arbiters in the search for wisdom have asserted that the world is flat, that sicknesses can be healed by the application blood-sucking leeches, bathing more than once a year causes colds, garlic repels vampire attacks, and that men are more intelligent than women.

In fairness, it should be noted that for the right sum of money, one can still engage the services of a distinguished advocate, lawyer, or politician who'll verify with a straight face that the previously listed assertions hold the fragrant force of truth even in the face of widespread skepticism or derision by the general public.

It's never been easy to know if an expert is competent or not, but thanks to the advent of that vigorous organ of truth, the Internet, the innovation of having no actual standards for the profession of expert opinion has produced a safe free market environment for those shopping for an expert.

Requiring a valid email address from a free account weeds out 99.999% of fraudulent and incompetent experts, leaving only 1,345,000 fakes, which is a very manageable number.

Freed from the tyranny of having to provide documentation of qualifications and allowing free market forces to police the supply of pundits, the Internet has fostered an abundance of professional opinion makers to fit any need or buttress even the weakest argument.

After all, nobody hires an expert to prove them wrong, and that creates downward pressure on rates. The free market is your friend.

One of the most popular reasons to hire an unassailable crackerjack of data is, of course, to cancel out the prosecution's expert in a murder trial. Since you could very well find yourself in such a situation when society breaks down, it's handy to know how the process works.

In a nutshell, two experts with an opposite opinion will generally cancel each other out in the eyes of a jury unless there's overwhelming physical evidence that makes the defendant look guilty as hell.

Before you think that we at the Boogie Underground are saying that as if it were a bad thing, remember that the silver lining in such a case is that in the chaotic, lawless atmosphere of dystopian anarchy, there'll be no need for courts, and stuff like that.

One might think that in a world without Cable TV News, Sports Talk Radio, or even nutrition when everyone is fighting over the last cans of beans, but in such dark times, The Boogie Underground assures you that the need will be greater, not less.

There are two things that'll still be necessary in a world without food, water, or electricity, and those are knowing who to blame for the mess and what religion promises the best comfort in the afterlife after you starve to death.

A cynic might suggest that a first-rate religion can provide both, but we at the Think-tank know that nuclear mushroom clouds and food riots won't covert atheists, who, of course, will be blaming God.

In spite of past errors in judgment and belief in nonsense labeled as science, experts have led us out of the stone age and, for the right price, will do so again.

Don't hesitate to contact the Boogie Underground Think Tank for our list of affordable services ranging from expert testimony to making outrageously false statements at rates cheaper than any lawyer.





Here's an update on each of my Vella books:




The Quitters


https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B09PC3L6PC


It's the first book, and after ten months, it's finally developing an audience, and the stats are trending upward this month. I think it's due to the blog and the new book/music video short format I'm using for its promotion. I’ve moved the plot lines away from potentially over technical descriptions of playing live to more emphasis on the personalities and in particular, the main character Nym. Also, some of the romance elements are now coming into play.


It's at 31 episodes, though as an ebook, we're talking maybe 15 traditional-length chapters. I'm keeping the format episodic and short, kind of like a weekly TV show, which works for Vella but will need to be restructured for the ebook.




I, Ivy


 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0B3RCBT4D


The story got off to a decent start, but I didn't notice that as it's obvious now that the daily totals on the Vella dashboard can differ or not jibe with the monthly or overall total, which have to be accurate as those numbers determine the royalty and bonus payouts. I'll be paying more attention to this one in November, as it’s being read more than I thought. The latest chapter, Ivy’s view of the efforts by a human to give her a pill should strike a familiar chord.




The Forbidden Lost Gospels Of Murgatroyde


 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0BJ2TW4P1


This is a new one, though it'll be the most familiar to blog readers. I'll be changing the format of the blog in November, and putting the Lost Gospels here will allow me to fully expand that line of humor and satire in a way that simply being a blog feature doesn't permit.




The Boogie Underground Think Tank: How To Survive The End Of Civilization


 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0BG6LNXTG


This one is a revival of an old humor column I ran in my old "Delta Snake Blues News" publication in the 90s and 2000s. The slant is about survival in the upcoming hard times, but it really will be topical and cover subjects that are offbeat but relevant. The next one coming in a few days will be "How To Shop For The Perfect Expert," which obviously will be a humorous commentary on the use of experts in general.



The Adventures Of Queen Khleopahtra: Ruler Of Egypt, Time Traveler, and Literary Detective


 https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0BJC122G7


This is another new one and will be a fun fusion of the old "Peabody and Sherman" cartoon, which was about a time-traveling dog and boy, Robert Graves' often satirical take on history, and the old "Fractured Fairy Tales" cartoon that used to be featured on the "Rocky And Bullwinkle Show." 


I chose Khleopahtra as the main character because it will offer the widest range of literary situations to explore, and I happened to have a cool drawing of her and liked the idea of expanding the character. After reading the first episode, you'll agree that the possibilities are endless.


In the latest episodes, we meet Achilles and the poet Homer, who will become recurring characters!



- Al Handa
   October 2022


The ebook “On The Road With Al & Ivy: The Anthology Volume 1 2016-2018 is now on Kindle Unlimited!

I’ll run free promotions later this month, but members can read it for free now.

I Can Make It To Christmas by Mark McGraw (of Handa-McGraw International). F IPlease check out and listen to Mark McGraw’s Christmas single from his album on Bandcamp,Can
Make It To Christmas by Mark McGraw (of Handa-McGraw Intern



Please check out and listen to my music on Spotify, YouTube, Apple Music and other music sites. Please add any cuts you like to your playlists!